Just days after retiring from the NFL, it appears Ricky Williams will be abruptly retiring from the Twitterverse, as well.
The running back, who has played eleven seasons in the NFL among three franchises – bookending a stint with the CFL’s Toronto Argonauts in 2006, as well as a brief retirement after testing positive for marijuana – has apparently caught heat from his wife on Saturday morning after bragging on Twitter about how, with the help of he “had the best sex ever” with her.
Williams officially retired on Tuesday. His Twitter accoutn had been largely inactive since the middle of his final season with the Baltimore Ravens. Predictably, Williams spent more time on Twitter after his retirement. “The NFL is an incredible organization, just doesn’t work for me anymore,” he tweeted on Thursday. “It helped me tremendously, for that I will be eternally grateful.”
Then on Friday night, he started delving into the world of religion. “What changed when Adam and Eve ate the apple? They forgot they were infinite, and allowed their minds to trick them into a finite existence… Aren’t we all doing exactly the same thing? If you read Jesus’ words, he told us that we are infinite.”
That series of tweets was later followed with one that read: “Oops, I forgot that everyone is allergic to Religion or anything associated with it. Thought we were past that.”
Williams has also been dabbling with spirituality and meditation. A few of his tweets have promoted the website for Pranic Healing, which includes a “featured article” with the former running back on “twin hearts meditation.”
In the interview, Williams said meditiation “is like food. It’s spiritual food, and I need to be fed… If I didn’t share this passion with people, it would be a sin.”
Little would Ricky know, he would start begging forgiveness for trying not to commit a “sin.”
Early this morning, after midnight (Eastern time), he sent a tweet plugging his “new favorite website,” AccessConsciousness.com. “I recommend taking at least a bars class. Will open you up so much!”
According to their website, here’s their description for an “access bars” class:
There are 32 Bars of energy that run through and around your head. They store the electromagnetic component of all the thoughts, ideas, attitudes, decisions and beliefs that you have ever had about anything. There are Bars for healing, body, control, awareness, creativity, power, aging, sex and money; just to name a few. Each thought, idea, attitude, decision or belief that you have fixed in place solidifies the energy and limits your capacity to be generative in that area and to have something different show up in your life with ease.
Looks like Williams was sold on one set of bars in particular. Today at 9:31 AM, he tweeted: “Ran bars on my wife and we had the best sex ever!!!”
“A great side effect if you like sex,” he added.
Realizing his Twitter account has once again blown up with replies, he writes, “Oops, did I do it again? Is everyone allergic to sex too?”
“More spiritual energy will lead to more sexual energy, just in case you didn’t know,” Williams instructed to his followers. “Meditating before sex is awesome too! Better than Viagra (from what I’ve been told).”
After a few exchanges with some of his followers – including one who questioned whether or not it’s appropriate for him to even talk about sex on Twitter in the first place (“Doesn’t he have like 10 kids?”) – Williams wrote tweets about random sports topics. “I’m excited for my boy Ray Rice, he is about to get PAID. Deserves it!” “Anyone see Jeremy Lin go off last night?” “Anyone see Jeremy Lin go off last night?” And perhaps one he should have stayed away from, given how he was just bragging about “the best sex ever” a mere half-hour ago: “Tiger is returning to form, watch out!”
Later, at 10:20 AM, he tweeted: “I wonder if me being me and people thinking I’m high has anything to do with why I started smoking in the first place? Hmmm? Best drug I found is me being me, it’s cheap (will actually make you money), easy to find, and doesn’t show up in your urine.”
Then at 10:49 AM, Williams dropped a bomb to his 85,000+ followers: “I think I’m going to delete my Twitter account this afternoon. My wife is pissed at me for talking about sex. This was fun though. Thanks.” He followed that with a tweet asking his followers to follow him at his charity’s Twitter account, @RickysKids.
I wonder if there are access bars for “being whipped”?
Anyway, it appears Williams must have had a tete-a-tete with his wife, and at around 11:30 AM, he tweeted this: “I talked to wifey and she said that I can keep tweeting if I get to 100,000 followers by midnight Pacific Time. Help me!”
You want help? I guess they don’t make access bars for “marriage counseling.”
He added, “She thinks I’m crazy, and that there is no way I can do it. This is for all of us whose families don’t get us!”
And finally: “I told her if I was doing sports radio, I’d be doing those natural enhancement commercials anyway.”
No doubt he probably took a class on the “celebrity endorsement” access bar, too.
So, was this a genuine compromise between Ricky Williams and his wife for him to retain his personal Twitter account, or just a cheap way to gain new followers?
And what will become of Williams’ newfound free time should he have his Twitter rights revoked on Sunday?
Well, he could see if they offer access bars on “responsibility in social networking.”
Or, as he tweeted early Friday morning: “I’m going to write a book of commentaries on Bob Marley songs. That will so much fun!”
Even more fun that “running bars” on your wife, Ricky?
UPDATE: As of 3 PM ET, not only are the aforementioned tweets from this morning about his great access bar-fueled sexual experience with his wife deleted, but also the tweets announcing he would delete his Twitter account. Oh, and he’s still a long way to go from 90,000 followers, let alone 100,000. Something tells me he’ll remain on Twitter tomorrow – which wouldn’t make him the first two-faced person to use Twitter.