Doug Gottlieb Drops White Noise On NCAA Pregame







Seated alongside Charles Barkley and others on CBS' NCAA pregame show, Doug Gottlieb claimed he was there "to bring diversity to the set... give the white man's perspective."

Seated alongside Charles Barkley and others on CBS’ NCAA pregame show, Doug Gottlieb claimed he was there “to bring diversity to the set… give the white man’s perspective.”

As the “sweet sixteen” from this year’s NCAA basketball tournament was about to tip off, Doug Gottlieb immediately left a sour taste in some viewers’ mouths.

Moments after the start of the pregame show on CBS, Gottlieb really stumbled out of the gate. It’s bad enough he started by taking two popular idioms and melding them together, talking about “cream rising to the crop”.

But sitting right in the middle of Greg Gumbel, Greg Anthony, Kenny Smith and Charles Barkley – all African-Americans – on the CBS/TBS set, Gottlieb went there.

“I don’t know why you guys are asking me, I’m just here to bring diversity to this set here, give the kind of white man’s perspective on things like the point guard position, no?”

Smith and Anthony were visibly stunned by the comment. Watch the video (alternate link).

Will Gottlieb be reprimanded for it? Probably not. After all, this is the same CBS that gave Craig “Vanilla Thunder” Kilborn a late night talk show.

UPDATE, 3.29.13: In the first segment of his radio show on CBS Sports Radio the following day (audio below), he said: “I said it before, I’ll say it again. Sometimes, you try and ice break a joke, and it doesn’t go over well. No one ever said I was a comedian, and apparently, I found the right profession, and comedy isn’t that profession.” He also made many references to the comment during the course of his show, with an extensive amount of time devoted to it in the third hour.

The fact that he was still able to do his radio show the day after the line means there’s likely no plans to suspend him, as I suggested. But the fact that it grew so much hair in the 24 hours since its utterance, he had to say something.

By the way, here’s some instant Twitter reaction to the latest in a long string of instances in which Doug Gottlieb puts the “madness” in March Madness:

Top Ten Reasons Sports Networks Should Stay Away From Rob Parker

ESPN has severed ties with Rob Parker, whose last take on “First Take” was debating whether or not Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III is “a cornball brother” who is “not down with the cause.”

There will be no next take for Rob Parker.

The “First Take” analyst, who had been serving a month-long suspension for openly wondering if Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III is “a brother or… a cornball brother,” is officially on a permanent sabbatical from ESPN.

The thirty-day suspension was retroactive to the day Parker uttered those remarks on ESPN2’s “First Take,” December 13. Which means he would have been eligible to return to the Worldwide Leader’s airwaves as soon as next week, perhaps in time for the new Saturday edition of “First Take” that ESPN had named him host of.

Now, because of his last “Take” – his boneheaded RGIII ultimatum – Parker won’t be working for the weekend.

“Evaluating our needs and his work, including his recent RGIII comments, we decided not to renew,” ESPN public relations wiz Mike Soltys disclosed via Twitter, regarding Parker’s contract, which he noted “expired at year end.”

Incidentally, on the first Sunday of the new year, who popped up on the NBC affiliate in Detroit but Rob Parker, maintaining that he didn’t intend for any “backlash” to happen, adding: “We are willing to tackle a lot of stuff that most shows won’t touch or even discuss. I think it’s important and that we’ve done it in a good way.”

See, there’s a reason that, say, Steve Mariucci isn’t breaking down RGIII’s strengths and weaknesses while throwing in that he “may be a Republican,” and that could doom him come November.

In other words, people “won’t touch” it for a reason.

And to go there and proclaim you’ve “done it in a good way”?

If I were George Bodenheimer or John Skipper, I’d break Parker off right then and there, rather than let him finish out the suspension.

But as Sports Business Journal’s John Ourand stresses, ESPN’s decision to ax Parker was made well before his Sunday sitdown in his old stomping grounds surfaced.

Whatever the case… not to pat myself on the keyboard here, but if you read my post on the day Parker’s suspension was made public, December 20, I argued that there could be a possibility that ESPN fire Parker at the end of the suspension. Okay, so he served 85% of it. But the fact of the matter is, he never appeared again on ESPN after his ill-advised RGIII take.

And I would be surprised if he appears on any sports television network in any meaningful role again.

Face it: Rob Parker is damaged goods. Who would want him?

And with that – and with apologies to David Letterman – I give you the top ten reasons, in the form of ten sports networks, or networks with a large sports operation, that will not dare “touch” Parker, as he himself would say.

ABC isn’t on the list, because Disney owns them, as they do ESPN. But here are some others that should have no use for his act:

10. The Golf Channel. Rob Parker probably believes it’s not dark enough for him.

9. NHL Network. The league may have just resolved its four-month-long lockout (you probably would never have known it if you were watching NHLN, unfortunately), but even egotist extraordinaire Gary Bettman isn’t crazy enough to hire Parker even in a “man-on-the-ice interview” role. Also, see Golf Channel.

8. MLB Network. Given Parker’s barbershop experience, they could appoint him as their resident “hair expert” – you know how some baseball players tend to stand out due to their kooky hairstyles. I’m sure there’s at least one MLBN employee that would welcome the move to bring Rob on board.

7. Fuel TV. Believe it or not, there may actually be a use for Parker at this channel, which specializes in MMA and other action sports. And as you may have noticed, many popular cable networks, in an effort to stay relevant when it comes to the bottom line, have been delving into the realm of reality TV. I’ve got the perfect reality show pilot for Rob Parker on Fuel: Viewers watch three crazy fights between couples or groups of people, and then have to figure out which fight was completely staged by Parker! Clearly, he has experience in this field. It would be perfect! Alas, Fuel’s days are numbered as it will eventually become Fox Sports 2 to Fox Sports 1.

6. SPEED. Features the kind of “racing” that Parker isn’t interested in. Also is slated to be blown up in favor of the aforementioned Fox Sports 2 this summer. As for the Fox network itself…

5. Fox. They already have a race baiter on their payroll. Next.

4. MSG Network. They already have a race baiter on their payroll. Next.

3. NBC. Their MSNBC unit canned Don Imus on the heels of his infamous “nappy headed ho’s” line to describe the mostly African-American Rutgers women’s basketball team.

2. CBS. Their WFAN radio canned Don Imus on the heels of his infamous “nappy headed ho’s” line to describe the mostly African-American Rutgers women’s basketball team, hours after MSNBC dropped him.

1. NFL Network. Not only did Rob Parker do a disservice to Robert Griffin III back on December 13 by suggesting he is “not down with the cause” and not the type of “brother” you would want to hang out with, he also did a disservice to the entity that signs RGIII’s paychecks: the National Football League. To hire Parker in any capacity in Culver City – poll taker, social media administrator, janitor – would be the worst move since the idea to hire replacement referees – and we all know how well that went. And you know who else would be ticked off about such a hire by NFLN: Football fans. Parker’s RGIII tirade was a detriment to them, as well. Any level-headed football follower could care less about whether or not Griffin wears braids, or any of the other “issues” Parker felt he had to “tackle”, while at the same time “[not] trying to slam the kid.”

The very next television outlet that hires Rob Parker for on-air work will be committing a slam on human nature.

Looks like he has to fix his Twitter handle now…

Rob Parker Suspended For One Month, Could Still Be Fired By ESPN

Radio hosts Opie and Anthony, currently at SiriusXM Satellite Radio, were fired by CBS Radio following a long suspension for a lewd stunt involving a Catholic church. The same fate might await Rob Parker for his “holier than RGIII” comments on “First Take”; ESPN has suspended him for one month.

Exactly one week after Rob Parker openly uttered on “First Take” that he suspected Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III might be “a cornball brother” and is “not really down with the cause,” while at the same time, Griffin actually is a “brother” because he dons braids, ESPN formally announced the personality’s suspension.

You may recall that, within 24 hours, the Worldwide Leader had confirmed Parker was suspended “indefinitely”. That “indefinitely” has now been redefined to a thirty-day suspension.

It’s very likely that the month-long suspension is retroactive to December 14, the day he was initially banished temporarily from ESPN’s air. Otherwise, if it’s effective today (December 20), that means that Parker will be eligible to return to “First Take” on Monday, January 21 – or Martin Luther King Jr. Day.

The network’s imposing of a thirty-day suspension of Parker comes just one day after he issued an apology through his Twitter account. (And no, all of those tweets and retweets supporting his “cornball brother” perspective have not been taken down.)

That’s two month-long suspensions the Worldwide Leader has doled out this year alone. Back in February, ESPN anchor Max Bretos was suspended for a month for using the term “chink in the armor” during a discussion about Jeremy Lin, then with the New York Knicks, during a segment on ESPNews.

And even though Bretos still remains employed by ESPN (which I don’t have a problem with, by the way), when ESPN says that they’ve “decided to suspend Rob Parker for 30 days”, do not think that the only thing that could happen is Parker serving his suspension and then returning in mid-January and things are hunky dory once again.

Because there still lies the possibility that ESPN ultimately give Parker a permanent vacation in a month from now. As Parker tweeted out his half-assed apology, sources believed that there was a 3 in 4 chance that Parker would be sent packing by the Worldwide Leader for his divisive comments about RGIII.

Remember, ESPN is still conducting a review, and might come across something that hasn’t reared its ugly head yet.

Or worse: The Washington Redskins might advance to the NFC Championship Game.

A number of things could happen that could lead ESPN to fire Parker upon serving out his suspension.

Let’s not forget, it’s possible to be terminated either during or following a suspension.

Ten years ago, radio shock jocks Opie and Anthony had seen their show go into reruns about a week after a “Sex For Sam” contest, which encouraged two listeners to fornicate in a pew inside the iconic St. Patrick’s Cathedral in New York City, before CBS Radio finally cancelled the show. Neither Opie nor Anthony issued an apology; then again, this is what they do (and it is admittedly entertaining, usually).

Five years ago, Don Imus, who did issue an apology after receiving backlash for his “nappy headed ho’s” comment was given a two-week suspension by CBS; once sponsors started dropping like flies, CBS changed their tune and pulled the plug on “Imus In The Morning” within three days.

And just a couple of months ago, Columbus sports radio host Scott “The Torg” Torgerson was suspended by Dispatch Media Group/WBNS-FM “97.1 The Fan” after tweeting his desire for an ESPN employee, Desmond Howard, to “die or get fired” so that “College GameDay” can be viewable to him. After one week, “The Fan” fired “The Torg.”

So let’s not rule out the possibility of Rob Parker being fired for his attack on Robert Griffin III. It could still happen.

And just in time for Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.

As Dr. King himself once said: “Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable. Every step toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering and struggle, the tireless exertions and passionate concerns of dedicated individuals.”

Translated: The passionate concerns of many individuals (bloggers and viewers, but mostly, bloggers) led to tireless exertions (ESPN’s “review”) and a subsequent effort for human progress (with “human” in this case being “First Take”). Yet, if ESPN sees itself struggling after suffering from a loss of advertising revenue, the obvious sacrifice would be to terminate Rob Parker.

And that would be justice for all.

(Irony: If you attempt to watch one version of Parker’s RGIII comments on YouTube, you will see the following message: “This video has been removed as a violation of YouTube’s policy against spam, scams and commercially deceptive content.” Ain’t that the truth: “First Take” might be the biggest scam going.)

Rush Limbaugh: "I Mistakenly Liked The People" At ESPN's NFL Pregame Show

While discussing Rob Parker’s comments on ESPN about Robert Griffin III, Rush Limbaugh admitted that during his own stint at the network, he “mistakenly liked” his “Sunday NFL Countdown” colleagues. “It was misplaced affection.”

It appears everybody related to sports media has a reaction to Rob Parker’s infamous “cornball brother” inquisition of Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III on ESPN2’s “First Take” – even those no longer affiliated with sports media.

Like Rush Limbaugh.

You may recall his brief stint as an analyst on ESPN’s “Sunday NFL Countdown” in 2003, which came to an abrupt end after his stance that “the media is very desirous that a black quarterback do well.” Those remarks were made regarding former Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb. Once ESPN denounced those comments, Limbaugh resigned from the program.

Of course, Limbaugh has been hosting the top talk radio program for 25 years. So even though he’s nine years removed from his short tenure at ESPN, he still feels the need to use his radio show as a forum to chime in on sports media controversies, especially those that involve his former employer.

Limbaugh dubbed Parker “a buffoon” and “a full-fledged separatist,” but that wasn’t all. While recalling what would be his final appearance at the Worldwide Leader, he seized the opportunity to throw his former “Sunday NFL Countdown” comrades – Chris Berman, Tom Jackson, Steve Young and Michael Irvin – under the bus.

“I really liked that pregame show,” Limbaugh told his listeners. “I mistakenly liked the people on it. It was misplaced affection.”

Gee, Rush. Was it misplaced affection when Dave Checketts and his pals purged you from the group making a bid to purchase the St. Louis Rams?

Anyway, you can watch Rush lob a verbal grenade at his ex-ESPN colleagues at the 3:00 mark. And as a bonus, later in this clip, he shares his thoughts on Steve Czaban and Andy Pollin, the Washington-based sports radio hosts that were suspended for mocking a transgender basketball player. Coupled with Parker’s attack on RGIII, Limbaugh reaches the conclusion that “ESPN has become a racist place.”

Rob Parker Sorry For RGIII Attack? Not A Cornball's Chance In Hell

Rob Parker touched a nerve when he suggested on ESPN’s “First Take” that Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III might be a “cornball brother,” and attempting to shy away from his “blackness.” He has since been suspended indefinitely by the network.

In the late 1990’s, one of the most popular talk shows on television was “The Jerry Springer Show.” When it launched twenty years ago, it was far from popular. Only when producers began coordinating phony physical violence did its ratings peak.

In 2003, a new daily program launched on ESPN2: “Cold Pizza.” The show featured debates with people such as Skip Bayless and Woody Paige.

Four years later, the show was revamped as “First Take.” Not only would Bayless remain with the show, but he would become a focal point of the program. You could say he’s the “ringmaster” of “First Take.”

In other words, whereas the show featured debates as “Cold Pizza,” as “First Take,” debates were the show.

But recently, there have been several instances on the show that have sparked controversy, including, but not limited to, Bayless suggesting Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter may have used HGH.

Yes, in many cases, these instances happen to be limited to racism. Stephen A. Smith had nonchalantly uttered the phrase “n***er, please,” then later insisted he did not say that phrase because he talks too fast.

The aforementioned Bayless is no angel in the racism department, either: This past summer, a quote attributed to him on the program, stating his disapproval of drafting “white players in the first round of the [NBA] draft” was posted as a tweet to the show’s official Twitter account – and eventually was deleted.

Then you have Rob Parker, who at times joins in “First Take’s” reindeer games. On the December 13 edition of the show, Cari Champion, who you could say is the Steve Wilkos of “First Take,” tossed out a question about what Washington Redskins rookie quarterback Robert Griffin III admitting that he doesn’t need to be defined by his race, says about RGIII as a player.

You can read the transcript here, but these are the highlights – or, should I say, lowlights: After assessing that he knows Griffin wants to be the best quarterback in the NFL, as opposed to being “the best black quarterback,” Parker, an African-American, posed this “straight, honest question: Is he a brother, or is he a cornball brother?” When asked to elaborate on the brilliantly ignorant term that Parker anointed RGIII with, Parker acknowledged that Griffin, while a “black” person, is “not really down with the cause; he’s not one of us.

“He’s kind of black, but he’s not really the guy you’d really want to hang out with because he’s off to do something else.”

Parker then ratted off a few qualities that Griffin possessed that are not common among many African-Americans, like being registered as a Republican and having “a white fiancee,” things that Parker said fueled his quest to “dig deeper” on RGIII, because he believes “he has an issue… I want to find out about him.”

When Bayless brought up the fact that Griffin bears braids, all bets were off. Parker: “Now, that’s different. To me, that’s very urban… Wearing braids, you’re a brother. You’re a brother if you’ve got braids on.”

It was at that point that Stephen A. Smith, another African-American, joined in.

“I’m uncomfortable with where we just went.”

Springer, please.

The video cuts off at that point, but Smith continued by proclaiming that everything about Griffin, from the braids in his hair, to the color of his skin, as well as that of the woman he will be tying the knot with, is “irrelevant” and “none of our business… That’s his life.”

But enough about the life of Robert Griffin. Let’s talk about the life of Robert Parker for a second.

Parker is no stranger to controversy himself. In 2008, he had to retract a report on a Detroit TV station that Michigan State quarterback Kirk Cousins – who, ironically, is serving as Griffin’s backup on the Redskins this year, and might start against the Browns this weekend – was part of an all-out brawl between football and hockey players, when in reality, he didn’t even set foot out of his parents’ house that night.

Later that year, on the heels of a dubious 0-16 season for the Detroit Lions, Parker, who was also a columnist for The Detroit News, threw a cocky question at then-Lions head coach Rod Marinelli: “Do you wish your daughter had married a better defensive coordinator?” (Marinelli’s daughter, Chris, happened to be wedded to the Lions’ then-defensive coordinator, Joe Barry.)

Of course, following a winless season, the Lions let Marinelli go and also sent his son-in-law packing. But Parker was suspended two weeks by the paper. At the start of the following year, still weighed by guilt from his loaded question at the former Lions head coach, Parker resigned from The Detroit News.

Parker has a history of pushing buttons long before he joined ESPN, so he knows the drill. Don’t think he had no clue what he was doing when he openly questioned the “blackness” of Robert Griffin III.

And ESPN knows what Parker was doing – perhaps quite too well. Many suggest that the remarks made on the show are about as real as the altercations on “The Jerry Springer Show” circa 1997. And ESPN has been known to manufacture controversies, there’s no doubt about that.

As soon as the segment aired, every sports media journalist had a thing or two to say about it. (This one included, of course.) And “Rob Parker” was even trending worldwide on Twitter – for a very, very long time, I might add.

But this is the kind of attention that ESPN thrives on now. It’s why, in fact, ESPN has not only expanded the “First Take” franchise into weekends during the “College GameDay” offseason, but is also considering importing that same “embrace debate” attitude from “‘hearsed Take,” I mean, “First Take,” into “SportsCenter.”

Parker will certainly issue an apology, but it’ll be about as genuine as Stephen A. Smith’s “I was talking too fast” defense on inadvertently dropping an N-bomb.

And even if Smith might have been dishonest at that point, he certainly proved to be way more credible than Rob Parker, when after his “cornball” diatribe, he said, “I don’t judge someone’s blackness… I just don’t do that. I’m not that kind of guy.”

Hours later, a Worldwide Leader PR person stated that Rob Parker’s “comments were inappropriate and we are evaluating our next steps.”

The next step should be for ESPN to curb the “First Take” empire before it takes whatever credibility it has left with it.

“The Jerry Springer Show” still airs on syndicated television today, but it’s not the same woman-slapping, chair-throwing, Steve Wilkos-restraining “Jerry Springer Show” that we’ve come to know back in the late 1990’s.

If John Skipper, George Bodenheimer and company aren’t careful, this could be the beginning of the end of ESPN as we know it – the self-proclaimed Worldwide Leader.

UPDATE: The next day, ESPN suspended Rob Parker “until further notice”; the network is also “conducting a full review”.

Until next time, take care of yourself, and each other.

Frank Isola Wants To See "Thick" Women At "12/12/12 Concert"

A tweet sent by Frank Isola, Knicks beat reporter for the New York Daily News, from the “12/12/12 Concert” at Madison Square Garden may have been reminiscent of an infamous comment made by Don Imus.

I’m sure as you were watching the “12/12/12 Concert For Sandy Relief” (and how could you avoid it, it was on dozens of channels), you were also plugged into social networking to gauge the reaction of others in your circle that were watching the show.

And in many a big event, there’s usually going to be at least one person on Twitter that might take things a bit out of hand.

Some of the most biting commentary on the concert came from New York Daily News basketball columnist Frank Isola, who at times appears on TNT and NBA TV as well as the regional sports network SNY.

The cause of the concert aside – benefit for victims of Hurricane Sandy – such big events were made for being criticized on Twitter.

But one of the tweets I read from Isola, who actually attended the concert in person, may have been a little over the line.

I’m not talking about the one where he observed that “this crowd is whiter than a Rangers game.” (He followed that up with a belief that “some of the concert proceeds should go to teaching everyone in the audience some rhythm” – which likely explains the previous tweet.)

It’s a tweet that he posted just after a Bruce Springsteen set (with special guest, fellow New Jersey native Jon Bon Jovi) at the event had wrapped up: “Let’s get a real New Jersey legend on the stage: J.R. Smith. Can you imagine how hot (and thick) his backup singers and dancers would be. Wow.”

Isola, of course, is referring to J.R. Smith, the guard on the New York Knicks team that he covers for the Daily News.

The same J.R. Smith that tweeted a photo of a female companion’s rear end during a hotel stay this past spring – and was subsequently fined for it by NBA commissioner David Stern.

It’s one thing if you’re going to make a reference to that little affair.

But if you’re using a term like “thick” – a term commonly used in the African-American community – to describe women, that’s when you start playing with fire.

Need I remind anyone what happened before the dawning of Twitter, when Don Imus described female basketball players – mostly African-American – during the national championship game between the Rutgers Scarlet Knights and the Tennessee Lady Volunteers in the NCAA Women’s Final Four as “nappy headed hos”?

While Imus had a visual to work with, it’s clear to see which direction Isola is going, especially if you factor in Smith and his “booty photo”.

Of course, Imus ended up being fired from WFAN/Westwood One and MSNBC, but he eventually landed a new radio/TV gig with Cumulus Media (nee ABC Radio/Citadel) and Fox Business Network. And just this week, Cumulus extended their contract with the I-Man.

Isola might have some explaining to do. It may not take a beer summit to fix it.

Chicken Comment Intended For Jimmy Johnson, Says Buckethead Bradshaw


Do you buy Terry Bradshaw’s spin move that he was referring to Jimmy Johnson when he said over a highlight of a Reggie Bush touchdown that “he was chasing a bucket of chicken”? Let us know in the comments below.

The day after his “Reggie Bush ran like he was chasing that bucket of chicken” remark on Fox went viral, Terry Bradshaw, like any right-minded individual in such a predicament, felt remorse.

He then proceeded to cover it up with perhaps the biggest spin job of all time.

I mean, this couldn’t possibly be fishier if Howie Long was running after a bucket of Long John Silver’s.

First off, his reaction: “I don’t know how to react, except to apologize for something I didn’t know I said.”

Let’s review the speech one more time.

As Dolphins running back Reggie Bush takes it to the house, TB says:

“Look at this, Jimmy, like he was chasing that bucket of chicken that the wind was blowing the other day.”

You could hear Bradshaw clearly speaking in the direction of “Fox NFL Sunday” colleague Jimmy Johnson, asking him to check out the video of Bush running like, well, whatever the hell he just said.

Here’s his mea culpa – are you ready for this? Bradshaw claims he didn’t realize that, while he was talking to Johnson, he said the word “he,” which, if an NFL player is being shown on the screen, viewers would see the player and hear Bradshaw say “he” and put two and two together.

Not so, he insists – I’m sorry; not so, Bradshaw insists.

Bradshaw meant to use the word “you” in that controversial sentence, as opposed to the word “he.”

You know, so it could sound even more demeaning to African-Americans.

“Look at this, Jimmy, like you was chasing that bucket of chicken that the wind was blowing the other day.”

Way to lay an egg there, Chicken Little.

Had Bradshaw originally said on the air, “… like he were chasing that bucket of chicken…”, then it might be believable.

But let’s get to the meat and potatoes of why Bradshaw really said what he said.

“His big thing is chicken,” he said on Monday. “Kentucky Fried Chicken. He won’t share it with anybody.”

Sorry, I’m not buying what he’s selling here – even if he throws in an order of the Colonel’s Crispy Strips.

And I know I’m not alone in being skeptical about Bradshaw’s explanation.

Ask the two African-Americans on the set – Curt Menefee and Michael Strahan – if they accept that cole slaw from TB. You mean to tell me, 24 hours after their obvious shocked responses, all suddenly happens to be well because it’s a bit revolving around one of the other hosts on the set?

“I’ve been in this business way too long, and am way too smart to make that kind of slip.”

Bradshaw started his vaunted broadcasting career immediately after he retired from the NFL in 1983. Yes, 1983, the same year, as I previously wrote, that Howard Cosell made those comments about Alvin Garrett. “That little monkey gets loose, doesn’t he?”

I don’t recall Cosell going to the media that Tuesday, explaining that he usually frequents the Bronx Zoo with Don Meredith.

You mean to tell me you were just starting out in sports broadcasting in 1983, Terry, and you were not watching “Monday Night Football” like millions of people did back then?

Nor do you remember what Don Imus said on his old Westwood One/MSNBC radio simulcast – the one you’ve appeared on several times.

And now you’re going to orchestrate this whole obsession that Jimmy Johnson has with fried chicken, and even have Curt Menefee as well as a couple of network spokespeople (“his entire commentary was directed towards Jimmy Johnson”; “his comment was directed at a studio mate and no one else”) on the take?

Maybe Jimmy does chow down on a four-piece bucket every Sunday. I mean, I’m not there, so I wouldn’t know. But I would like to know the location of the Kentucky Fried Chicken that Fox has been ordering from (at 9 AM in the morning local time, mind you) and asking for the “JJ Special”.

“I’ve been upset today,” said Bradshaw on Monday.

As he should be.

“I don’t think like that. I think strictly about what’s happening on the field.”

Was that not Reggie Bush on the field in a highlight that played underneath Terry’s chicken analogy?

“It’s not me. I’m shocked.”

I’m shocked, Terry, that you would go to great lengths to cover up this slip of the tongue with such a bizarre story – which, again, could be true… but given the course of events, sounds a bit contrived.

“I can’t believe I said it.”

Loser loser chicken dinner.